My Hairstory
August 4, 2009 by Marguerite Orane
Filed under Accept, Featured Posts
My hairstory happy ending!
“Your dreads are so beautiful” a new acquaintance said to me “Is it just style or is it something more?” “Oh, just style” I responded flippantly, by now used to comments like this.
Yet, I realize that my locks are NOT just style. Yes, they are done using Sisterlocks, a very scientific locking technique. But as I reflected on this conversation, I realize that my locks are a lot more – they are the happy ending to my hairstory.
Every black woman with kinky hair has hairstory – not one hairstory, but an amalgam of many, many experiences about the nappiness, kinkiness, badness, unruliness of her hair. From the weekly washing and combing, the chorus of “ouch! You are hurting me”, the screams, the tears from the pain, hands holding head as if trying to pull off the scalp so the comb crawing through hair won’t hurt anymore; up through the years to creaming and hot comb, chemical and iron burns on scalp and hairline and endless hours spent under hairdryer hell. Then to being natural and short, but wondering how to grow and manage the hair. I discovered cane row and extensions, which started to give me the freedom I yearned for . Yet, there were limits: cane row was somewhat rigid – one style, albeit so beautiful, for weeks – and extensions just didn’t feel like mine (they weren’t). Then there were the hurtful labels of “bad hair”, comments “That hair need to cream”, and comparisons with a sibling and cousins who have “good hair”. Oh yes, I have hairstory. We all have hairstory.
But my hairstory has a happy ever after ending. My locks are liberation. I never, ever, ever have a bad hair day – they always look good – even if I don’t think so, the compliments I receive tell me so. My locks have dispelled the myth that “black people hair can’t grow long” as they brush my lower back. My locks facilitate my active life and lifestyle. My locks are more than style – they are much, much more. My locks remind me that God made me beautiful with this head of hair that really is my crowning glory.
Here (or hair?) I am in the photo shoot for the cover of my book “Free and Laughing” – happy hair – that’s me! Happy in my hairstory! Accepting me for who I am!
brassy, bold. and why not?
Thank you for expressing it this way. This is so what I feel.
I went through all those experiences myself – and in that sequence too – until I discovered the liberating Sisterlocks! In Jamaica, I loved my locks, felt comfortable and was just enjoying my nice head of hair. I still love it (sometimes) but the challenge is that I now live in a country where I sometimes wonder whether it is a hindrance to my advancement. It puts me in a troubling and often roller-coaster kind of psychological state – one minute I’m going to chop it off, the next minute I’m going to colour it, next, wear it a little shorter as long hair makes me look older and most of the time, “I love my hair – this is who I am!” So, my hairstory continues!!
I’ve just paused in writing this paragraph and guess what, I feel good! It’s wonderful to be sharing about my hair this way. Love you, Marguerite and the other folks who have commented.
Hi Sybil – I can relate to the Sisterlocks thing. I love my hair as it is, but I also know that one day I will just chop it all off! When I tell people that they gasp!!! But I know that I can’t allow long hair to be my squirrel – I have it now, and it keeps growing, but it causes me all sorts of neck, shoulder and back problems if it gets too long. See? What to do with the squirrell when you catch it. Important thing is to be authentic and to make the decision that makes you happy – not what you THINK other people expect you to do! All blessings to you!