SOULMATES

In the arena of love and intimate relationships, we often speak about finding our soulmate. This person, we believe, is THE ONE who will complete us – physically, mentally, spiritually and emotionally. This is THE person with whom we will resonate so totally that we will feel whole and complete. We believe that this person is our ultimate intimate partner. We believe that the minute we see this person we will KNOW who he/she is, for our souls will instantly connect. We spend much time and energy searching for this twin half of our soul.

Most of us will be disappointed in this quest. For it is impossible to find ALL that we say we want in one person. We are each individually unique. There is no-one else in the world like us. To expect that we will find one person who exactly matches us, or complements our very being, is setting ourselves up for disappointment and frustration.

I got to musing about this concept of the “soulmate” when I received a birthday greeting from one of my very dearest friends, Nigel, whom I have known for over 30 years. “I know I am very grateful to have you as a friend and soulmate” he wrote. This is a person who I see very rarely. We have always lived in separate countries. He now lives in the Far East. We e-mail each other now and then. He always calls on my birthday, and never forgets the birthdays of my children. When we do meet, it is instant connection and joy. We are always happy to see each other. I have had experiences where I have been thinking of him and he calls. I know that whatever happens in my life, he is there for me. I know that he would jump on a plane and fly half way around the world to be with me, should I ever need. I know that he supports and loves me unconditionally. I support and love him unconditionally. I have been there for him through his three marriages; he has been there for me through mine. When he refers to me as “my soulmate” I realise that we truly are soulmates. I have often wondered why our relationship is so special. Now I know – our souls reconnected many years ago when we met on this physical plane, and instantly remembered that our souls were always connected.

With this statement my friend helped me to realise that it is possible for me to have many soulmates. There are so many people that I have connected with on a very deep level, and remain connected to. They have remained with me regardless of distance or time. Some I may never meet again. Others pop in and out of my life. One or two I acknowledge are “to be continued” in another lifetime, knowing that there is more to our relationship – but not now. My soulmates are always with me, connected deeply to my soul.

The truth is that the soul does not need a mate – it is already complete. Our soul is that deeper part of us that is the drop in the ocean of the infinite Soul – God. It is already whole and complete with all the attributes of the Soul. When we recognise this we can cease our search for THE ONE, and simply BE THE ONE. This will open us up to recognising all our “soulmates” with whom we connect through time. What a freedom to know that I do not need to “find” someone who is everything to me. What a freedom to know that I do not need to BE everything to someone. I am free to simply focus on being all I can be – open to connecting with all of my soulmates, open to connecting with my Soul.