The Rope and The Cross

This Easter morning, I had the delightful experience of the 6.00 a.m. Easter Sunrise morning of worship in dance and music, presented by the National Dance Theatre Company of Jamaica. One particular dance that I had seen many times resonated with me in a different way this morning.

“The Rope and The Cross” depicted the meeting of Mary, mother of Jesus, and Judith, mother of Judas after their sons had died. It shows the anguish of both at losing their offspring. What touched me profoundly was the depth of emotion of Judith. Here was a woman who had experienced a double tragedy – her son’s betrayal of the Messiah, and his subsequent suicide. As I watched, with two of my children and my mother seated beside me, I started to feel this woman’s pain. Tears rolled down my face uncontrollably. I understood that this woman was in anguish because of what her son had done, and not for who he was – for he was still her son, and she still loved him. I understood how my mother loves me and all her children, but not necessarily the things we do or have done. I understand that I will always love my children, but not necessarily the things they will do.

This is the anguish that mothers bear – to love your child no matter what they do, no matter what you say or do, no matter the state of the outward relationship between you. It is easy to despise someone who does something despicable, but how do you deal with your emotions when it is the “fruit of your loins”? It is like being pulled in two – for once we birth and raise a child, we love that child at the deepest level forever. And so when they make serious errors of judgement, we continue that love, yet being torn by not loving their actions. Some of us express this love in inappropriate ways, when our dislike for what our children have done overpowers our deep love for them. Even so, deep within is that primal love of mother/child.

And then there was Mary. From her own despair, she reached out to Judith, as mother to mother. It was this reaching out that caused Judith to realise that she was not alone, that she had company in grief. For when a child dies, all mothers hurt; all mothers feel the pain; all mothers cry. This universal love can transcend hurt, grief and pain allowing Mary to comfort Judith, even as she grieved for her own son, Jesus.

It is good to remember that everyone at some time or another was somebody’s child. If we approach people in this way we will be able to see beyond what they do, and see their inner divinity. This helps us to forgive and to move on. It helps us to love and to be, and bring, peace.